Dear diary,
Who brings a trombone to an exorcism? Seriously?
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
August 31
Dear diary,
Annual union meetings held today. Witches demanded more cats. Refused ferrets as substitutes. Vampires finally got blood option in coffee vending machine. Werewolves demanded flea powder to be included in budget. And banshees still won't shut the fuck up about zombie vending machine. We all have to deal with it, you're not special.
Annual union meetings held today. Witches demanded more cats. Refused ferrets as substitutes. Vampires finally got blood option in coffee vending machine. Werewolves demanded flea powder to be included in budget. And banshees still won't shut the fuck up about zombie vending machine. We all have to deal with it, you're not special.
Sunday, August 29, 2010
August 30
Dear diary,
Located wailing noise in office. In related news, Rex didn't run away with that cocktail waitress.
In unrelated news, Stanley took my parking spot again. So, I replaced his car with a leotard wearing unicorn. Taking bets on how long it takes him to live this down.
Located wailing noise in office. In related news, Rex didn't run away with that cocktail waitress.
In unrelated news, Stanley took my parking spot again. So, I replaced his car with a leotard wearing unicorn. Taking bets on how long it takes him to live this down.
August 29
Dear diary,
TV won't turn off or change from home shopping channel. May have to move. Can't stop buying creepy garden gnomes. Would call TV repair man or possibly exorcist but can't reach phone. They're watching me.
TV won't turn off or change from home shopping channel. May have to move. Can't stop buying creepy garden gnomes. Would call TV repair man or possibly exorcist but can't reach phone. They're watching me.
Saturday, August 28, 2010
August 28
Dear diary,
Office has infestation of zombie penguins. Most awkward/adorable infestation ever. Office competed over who could punt one the furthest during lunch break. Steve from accounting cleared the parking garage.
Office has infestation of zombie penguins. Most awkward/adorable infestation ever. Office competed over who could punt one the furthest during lunch break. Steve from accounting cleared the parking garage.
Friday, August 27, 2010
August 27
Dear diary,
In hospital for scrotum stapled to leg. In other news, I have no idea whose scrotum this is. Need to lay off the tequila.
In hospital for scrotum stapled to leg. In other news, I have no idea whose scrotum this is. Need to lay off the tequila.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
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